Dear Bruce, I need direction!

18. April 2008 by BruceSmith.

Dear Bruce,

I need some direction in my life. It seems that nothing I try really gives me the fulfillment I am looking for. I have tried money…its o.k. and buys me a lot of stuff, but still leaves me a bit empty. I have tried sex…sometimes good, mostly not, never fulfills me, and leaves me often craving something sex never gives me…I think its love. I have tried success and titles, …again, I still know who I am inside despite what others think about the name plate on my door. I have tried charity work, giving money away, volunteering, you name it. The story is the same…I cannot seem to find fulfillment. How the heck do I find that?

Angelica

Angelica,

Your tale is a common one. I talk with countless people who could state the very same desires, experiences, and thoughts you convey in your letter. Let me first make clear that none of the things you have “tried” are in and of themselves bad things. Money has its place. Sex is amazing in the right place and right time. Success and accomplishment can be fantastic, and volunteering and giving of one’s time, money, and energy is certainly a good thing. The central element in fulfillment, however, lies not in what we do, feel, experience, and attain, but rather in whom we find our fulfillment.

St. Augustine said it this way, “We shall find no rest until we find our rest in thee (God)”. As Shel Sivlerstein’s books about the Missing Piece allude to, there is a part of us which is missing, a part which cannot find its place. That part, that puzzle piece can never experience the right “fit” or sense of completion apart from a knowledge of our Creator.

Logic would seem to suggest that if God did indeed create this world (and I would offer that “something” cannot spring forth from “nothing”), then that God, who must have had no needs in and of Himself, did so for a reason. Perhaps, we find that sense of fulfillment in realizing that we were created for a purpose beyond ourself, one that includes an intimate relationship with the very Being who designed us in the first place. If we stop long enough to consider the wonder of this idea, it is truly mind-boggling. The Creator of the universe desires that I might walk in intimate relationship with Him! That is an amazing reality.

When this core issue is understood and we respond to God in acceptance of His offer to know and be known by Him, it sets us up for a life with purpose. Then all that we do and become is an outgrowth of knowing whose we are and why we exist in the first place. The trouble is we are more apt to want to define ourselves rather than look to the one who has defined reality for us, and who is in Himself, reality itself.

I explained this idea earlier this week when I spoke at an event and shared a practical story about my life. Recently, my PDA went wacko on me and left me in quite a fix. My PDA (personal data assistant) is many things to me. It is my phone, calendar, file sorter, email platform, text messaging device, note taking device, and many other things. Without it I am drastically hindered from doing and being what I am called to do and be in a practical sense.

The greater difficulty in having my PDA freak out on me is that I have lost the manual. I cannot, therefore, figure out what the problem is. Further, no one I have taken it to seems to know how to fix it. I could consult other PDA manuals, I suppose, but how would that help me find the true fix for my PDA? I could just ignore the problem, but how would that help me find my way in the world? Without the direction this device provides for me I am in a fix…lost and out of sorts.

I would suggest that this is an apt metaphor for our position in the world and a good illustration of where you may find yourself. There are plenty of places you can go to “fix” your problem of fulfillment. But, as you have discovered, it seems, none of those fixes truly fix you. You need personal directional assistance (PDA). Our ultimate PDA is God as He has revealed Himself in the Scriptures. It is here that you will find your sense of purpose and fulfillment in life. Separated from God’s manual, life remains broken and unsatisfying. There is no fix apart from God’s direction. Nothing we try will fill the void.

This is why we see and hear of so many with so much (money, sex, power, drugs, drink, travel, fashion, influence, …) who remain so broken and empty and depressed. Despite our affluence in America mental illness is on the rise, use of antidepressants is soaring, violence is raging, and relationships continue to deteriorate in our culture. Stuff is not missing, rather, the stuff which makes for a life worth living is in small supply. That stuff is the teaching of scripture which shows us how to live and who to live for. That is our direction, and our way to a life worth living.

Angelica, no matter how much you do for yourself and for others, no matter how “good” it looks, even if the work is “good” in practice, it will always leave you and others empty if removed from the life and love of God as revealed in Jesus Christ. In knowing and experiencing intimacy with Him you find yourself and life as it was meant to be lived.  He is the composer who offers us a role in His great opus.  He is the conductor who enables us to to offer others the gifts He has given us.  All of our talents, ambitions, longings, and loves come alive only within the pages pages of His score.  Anything short of this reality is a groping in the dark.  The light of life and the thrill of living springs forth from intimacy with God through Christ.  You have tried  many other things, why not give Him a chance?

Seek Him and be found,

Bruce Smith

optimuslife.org

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