You are currently browsing the Bruce Smith weblog archives for June, 2009.
27. June 2009 by BruceSmith.
I pray
for wisdom
for love
for persistent purity
and for persevering faith.
I pray
for devotion to truth
a hunger for deep thought
unwavering peace
and unbridled joy.
I pray
for grace amidst failure
the ability to lead others to the right things
a heart that heals
and eyes that speak of sincerity.
I pray
that righteousness would always attract me
that evil would be found repugnant by me
that words of beauty would be spoken by me
and that my countenance would speak of His presence alive in me.
I pray
that I would love what He calls me to love
that I would abstain from that which He does not offer me
that my errors would not be fatal
and that my victories would be revolutionary.
I pray
that my soul would ever be thirsting for Him
that my heart would always beat for Him
that my mind would always crave more of Him
and that my passion would always burn for Him.
I pray
His will
His way
His time
His all, all the time.
I pray
God, be my source, my only source.
Define me, defend me, and have me.
Amen.
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21. June 2009 by BruceSmith.
Simply Worship
Laying alone in bed, still awake(again), the clock burning through midnight, after days of adrenaline, hope, expectation, uncertainty, fear, exhilaration, and the chasm that is the unknown, and worn out from it all, I go back to simplicity, the simplicity of worship.
Surrounded by what appears so desirable, beautiful kids, well appointed home, closet to die for, nice wheels, trips, and all the rest, somehow the sense still lingers: its intimacy with God I need most. Nothing else, no one else, not even everything I want, will fill the void, quench the thirst.
Amidst a life filled with many great experiences, full moments, toys galore, over-sized televisions, bucket list items punched, published writings, and the mirage that is “notoriety”, the yearning grows, the pulse beats stronger, the hunger moves deeper. Intimacy with God. Worship. Intimacy, worship. Without these the rest is worthless. In light of these, the rest is irrelevant. With these two, intimacy with God, and the resource of worship, life is simplified, even if just for a moment, and my soul finds its bearings.
And so, I will continue to lie awake, not knowing what is coming next, and I will simply worship. Lost in that worship, enveloped by the tangible grip of God, I will allow one tear, then another, and maybe yet a few more, a mixture within each tear–a mixture of all that my life contains, the good, bad, and the rest– to run down the sides of my face, soak the pillow, and in the stillness of that moment, with a modern, pensive rendition of the simple tune “The Old Rugged Cross”, “Just Jesus”, or “Every hour I need thee” humming in the background, I will offer myself completely to God.
In this moment, in this space, I am finding myself again. Its not really me I am finding actually, but the One who defines me. And in finding Him, the self is restored, I know who I am because of whose I am, and I am held. My soul is secured. This is the beauty of simplicity, the simplicity of worship, and the gift of intimacy with God. It is, essentially, the one thing I need, the only thing I need, even if my world shall fall away. If I shall acquire all of my dreams or attain none of them, if I have Him, I shall be full. Its not about the what, but the Who. Its not longer mine to struggle over. The pains of the past which so dictate the feelings and fears of today…they are His in this moment. The cravings of the past…His. The drives for more of “Me” now and in the future…done. His. In worship, and in my surrender to this moment of intimacy, my world is heavenly. He is my heavenly. I long to stay here. Every hour, every day. I start, again, tonight, this morning. Simplicity. Worship. Intimacy.
Father, may I end each day in this place, may I wake to each new sunset awash in this reality. Your will be done. I worship you. Its all yours. I am all yours. Amen.
Bruce Smith
Happy Father’s Day
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16. June 2009 by BruceSmith.
What’s Your Goo-Ga?
What is that thing that really captures your attention, focus, effort, passion, and pursuit? Is it your career, your love life, your notoriety? Something else? Where do relationships, life-giving, soul-nurturing, other-centered relationships fit in? This is the question for Eddie Murphy in his new movie “Imagine That”.
The overarching message of the movie, the one that sticks, in a surprisingly profound way for a Murphy flick, is the theme of relationships, family. In the movie, Eddie plays a career obsessed, money hungry, and advancement crazed money manager whose sole focus is the next big deal, the next move up. Lost in the shuffle, somewhere along the way, is the opportunity to experience the benefits of a rich family life, and the gift of knowing and loving his daughter. His marriage, already having dissolved, and his contact with his young daughter limited, his life has become flashy, but utterly void of meaningful identity. Even to his company, he is only as good as the last deal.
As Mr. Murphy is forced into caring for his daughter, due to the parental custody sharing agreements, he finds himself in a real pickle. Problem is, his daughter could not be coming around at a worse time for him. With big deals in the works, and a possible huge promotion at stake, he views his time with his daughter as a forced obligation at best, and more accurately an obstacle to his goals. Until, that is, he realizes she owns a magic blanket (her “goo-ga”) which brings an imaginary world into view for her, one in which he finds a queen and princess who are able to tell him exactly which stocks to pick for his client’s portfolios! Suddenly, his forced parental obligations have rewards for him, and he becomes psychotically driven by the powers and privileges of the goo-ga.
Along the way, however, what Mr. Murphy does not see happening is that the goo-ga’s greater powers lie in it’s ability to bring he and his daughter into meaningful relationship for the first time. As his big deals and bigger promotion get fouled up by his addiction to the blanket he nearly wrecks the relationship with his daughter which is blooming for the first time. Amidst a desperate attempt to call forth “one last” big deal in order to secure the top leadership position in the company, Murphy has an epiphany. As he is seated before the owner of the firm, just at the moment everything is being handed to him, he begins to replay the recent moments with his daughter in his mind. His “come to Jesus” moment takes place just as the owner of the company is a sentence or two away from saying, “Its all yours.”, and as he is reaching into his briefcase and happens upon the goo-ga which had brought him to this moment.
At that instant, realizing he has missed the power of the goo-ga altogether, and finally measuring the nature of his “wealth” realistically, he stands up, looks his future in the eye and says, “I can’t do this…I have to be somewhere else.” The revelation of his true treasure has transformed him, and just in time. As he touched that blanket in his briefcase, a new tool which had a dramatically different feel than the hard-bound portfolios which his hands were accustomed to embracing, he remembered not the deals the blanket had won, but the enormous satisfaction the blanket had given him in the context of relationship for the first time in his life.
Scrambling from the meeting and making his way through the city, driving like, well, like I drive too often, and hurrying to make it to his daughter’s play, the transformation of his passion and pursuit could not be more vivid. Walking into the auditorium just as his daughter’s heart is breaking in two because he is not there, and knowing he chose the business meeting over her, he walks in with a makeshift king’s costume made from supplies at his office and his once pristine business suit, and he scores a big win. Her heart leaps for joy, she has renewed confidence in her role, and both lives are renewed in the process.
In the end, the goo-ga, the security Murphy’s daughter could not possibly do without, is joyfully relinquished by her. In that very same moment, Mr. Murphy, who had become equally dependent upon the blanket and its powers, let’s it go as well. The two, together, had found there real goo-ga, each other, for the first time.
So, I ask you today, what’s your goo-ga? Does it lead you to heart enlarging, relationship inspiring, and difference making pursuits? Have you yet discovered that what makes life truly rewarding is that which contributes to the love, growth, and nurturing of others? Or have you sacrificed enduring love and meaningful life for pleasure, riches, advancement, or some other agenda? What, or who is your goo-ga?
In Christ, we find our perspective, our priorities, truest passion, and deepest pleasure. He is the only goo-ga worthy of your soul. Find your security in Him. In so doing, you will find, unfolding before your eyes, the living reality of that story you always wished you could write for your life. Are you ready? Imagine that!
Get your goo-ga on! (Say that word five times…it feels really good :) )
Bruce Smith
optimuslife.org
blog.optimuschoice.com
soulstormsite.com
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12. June 2009 by BruceSmith.
Here is another installment in Bruce’s collection of Romantic Poems. For all you broken, mangled, blissful, and bored in love…we trust this one will inspire you to relate, experience, risk, return, and run to the loves God brings your way, and resist those He has not intended for you. Enjoy the read:
Love’s a Spinning Wheel
There she was again,
She had been gone for many moons, only God knows where,
She was the one that never should have been,
And, yet, the one I was called to long for.
There she was again, someone strike up a band,
This tune will be a hit, or else, the other hand,
Shall this verse ring true, a symphony or something new
Or is this a fitful ditty, another line in blue,
Shall she ever remain an elegy, a sorrowful dirge, untrue.
Why does she appear now, of all times,
When I had put her far behind, forgotten her bitter pain,
From my honest heart she had fled, her mouth and heart closed,
I had considered my hopes for her gone and dead.
I do not have to love her nor remember her kiss,
Still her pull, though hidden, will not fade,
Its her good that I long for, and always have,
It is her hidden goodness, and innocent delight, I long to see.
There she was again, one of few loves in my life,
After I had dropped my love, and turned my head,
And, though the love, my love for her, I chose to flee,
Admittedly, I have never abandoned the care instilled in me.
Called from above to care, at least it seemed,
I still remember the texture, the smell, the spell of her hair,
The feel of her fingertips brushing my palm, the call to another world,
It haunts me, her touch, while fleeting and jaded, once blew my mind.
Is hope from above fleeting and false, like tinsel on a tree,
Is there no love that wins a wandering heart, and brings her to me
Where is the grace which woos a broken and calloused heart,
Where is the redemption I thought was promised me.
I thought she was to be mine, but no
She’s been gone forever now, a full cycle of months,
plus three and nine,
What heart needs a love that had fallen in another time.
But here she is again, or is she,
I know not what she wants or why,
I fear its not what once was lost,
Or was it ever there, did she ever really care
I never enjoyed Merry-go-rounds,
No, not even as a child
I won’t get on that fatal ride again,
The thrill only makes me sick,
It’s all ugly in the end.
Where did she come from,
Whose was the last heart to rend,
Here she is, she’s showed up again,
Is she merely docking from her sea of pleasures,
Is she only battered by the wind
I’m not sure why she’s here nor why I dare.
Must I die upon the altar of platonic care,
Will I never be gifted with the aroma of her hair,
May I not touch and memorize the lines of her back,
Is this all a mirage, again, just another broken dream
Here she is again,
Has anything changed, its too doubtful, I should swear
Another swim in the waters of uselessness I cannot stand to bare,
I will put her out of my mind, its the only course for this heart
The one I’ve taken up many a hill, into countless ravines,
This heart, its the only one I have left, I must guard it as a gift.
Every day, every hour,
I shall will her away, once and for all
Be gone my love, my dream, my ghostly calling, my foolish hope
I cannot endure the longing for your goodness, your future, your hope
Be gone, be gone till you are wholly His and truly mine.
Unless God shall win our hearts as one,
Any pursuit of us shall be undone,
It is He, and He alone, who makes all loves true,
Bliss is knowing it is He alone, and me, and you.
Be gone till then my love, be gone.
Hold tight my heart, love’s a spinning wheel
Perhaps this is the day, after all
Two hearts are wed above, and thus they heal.
Here we go again, yet another spin,
Another ride, another hope, another chance to begin and win,
Am I ready to hop on this train once missed,
This heart is unsure, dangling from a cliff.
Can I believe in another amorous adventure,
Is it my will that must be ready to decide,
Brace yourself, now, cautious heart,
No, throw fearful caution to the wind.
Love’s a spinning wheel.
Bruce Smith
June 2009
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11. June 2009 by BruceSmith.
Kung Fu Sex, Hate Crimes, and the search for Goodness
If you have read the headlines the last few days, you know of two stories which speak of misery, addiction, hate, and sadness. David Carradine, former “zen master” star of the Kung Fu series from the 70’s, and star in the Kill Bill movies, was found dead in Bangkok. The circumstances surrounding his death, initially presumed or at least reported as a suicide, are more than a bit disturbing. If the line of reasoning and evidence continue along the lines they have in the last couple of days it will be documented that Mr. Carradine died from sex play gone horribly wrong. It seems, at this point, that the ropes tied around various parts of his body were not, as initially reported, the outworking of a suicide, but rather, some sort of horrid sex game which involved more than a bit of danger. Not exactly what was in mind when it was said, “That’s the way to go.”
The other story, from our nation’s capitol, is one of anger, rage, hatred and violence. It seems clear now that Mr. von Brunn, a known anti-semite and hate monger, carried out a hate crime on the grounds of one of our important museums which stands as a vivid reminder of the price of hatred and the abandonment of reason. At our national Holocaust Memorial Museum two people were killed as Mr. von Brunn began his rampage.
When we encounter this kind of ugliness in the news stories of our world, it is easy to question if there is any good left in our world. Amidst a world full of chaos and tragedy we can become bitter, cynical, and jaded. But here in lies the truth hidden behind the veil of evil.
We live in a world where we desperately desire to redraw the lines. In our attempt to find ourselves, apart from any moral absolutes, we are prone to drift too far from the shoreline of rational behavior. Our obsession with our individual right to live as we choose leads, often, to a life of increasing compulsion and addiction to things we once thought would bring us pleasure or contentment.
Mr. Carradine’s story ought to remind us that expressions of our sexuality, detached from any standard of truth, can lead to an open ended and ever increasing search for more. That search can lead to painful realities. Mr. Carradine’s route to this end was no doubt begun on a road that appeared to him to offer only fun and adventure. Without any compass with regard to sexuality who is to say that any form of sexual expression is amiss? Is this not the question of our day, and our current political climate? In the aftermath of such stories, and many much worse (the sexual slavery of women, men, boys, and girls which is running rampant in our world now, for example) who can doubt that something is “wrong”? But, how can we dare admit this in our day when we crave the unleashing of our mores, and want so desperately to redraw the lines and even re-define the family? We don’t dare use common sense nor read the manual on the “plumbing” in a culture where moral freedom is the call of the day. Don’t tie me down!, we say.
But where does our right to anything we want find its grounding? How can this logically be supported? As has been asked of the moral cynic before, “In some cultures they love their children, and in some they eat them…do you have a personal preference?”
You see, the problem with suggesting that either Mr. Carradine’s or Mr. von Brunn’s behavior is immoral is that it opens up the gateway to the “truth” question all over again. If the activities and unfolding events represented in these stories can be labeled as “wrong” in any sense, then we must logically admit there is some standard of truth we all acknowledge when the rubber meets the road. We cannot, after all, abandon the reality of moral boundaries all together. This would make life unlivable. We drive a certain way because we know if we abandon all reason on the roads we will hurt ourselves or others. That is the truth. We don’t run and jump off of the tops of tall buildings even though Spiderman does it because we know what will truthfully happen if we do. Simple math. Or is that Physics? I liked neither. Truth is unavoidable. Didn’t your math teacher make that clear? Mine did…darn her!
The truth hidden in the stories of the day should point us toward a pursuit of truth and goodness. We just know there is a better way to do sex than to be hung and suffocated in some hotel room in Bangkok. And we just know we should not be filled with so much hate that it motivates us to walk into a museum and start firing away at people we don’t even know. Such moments ignite within us an ache of the soul and a thirst for goodness. That which we thirst for is true goodness, and a break from the madness. Such refreshment of the soul and healing for the world can only come if it exists in the form of an all knowing, loving, and good God, a God beyond us and not defined by us. It certainly won’t come from within us. Recent history continues to point out that we are all too prone to bad acts. Truth is, the world is not becoming a “better place”. It will not, and cannot, separated from an embrace of absolute truth.
The challenge for us, in light of these kinds of stories, is to evaluate our own lives and our own demands for life on our terms. The truth hidden amidst the broken choices and painful realities of our own addictions is that goodness does exist. We would not, could not, ever have a sense of evil if goodness were not a reality. We sense or perceive evil in light of the reality of the true and the good. Truth shines the light upon the darkness. The moments of soul aching exist because something more calls to us amidst the pain and says, “Come hither.” There is a profound beauty which can be lived and expressed. The world can be a better place. It must begin with an acknowledgment of and a pursuit of Truth.
Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life.” He is the way to sexual fulfillment, the road to peace and compassion, and the means, the very reality of the adventure we seek.
Bruce Smith
optimuslife.org
blog.optimuschoice.com
soulstormsite.com
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8. June 2009 by BruceSmith.
Game, Set, Match! …no, wait, there was a “let”– A divine look at “do-overs” & Moral Mulligans.
In the game of tennis one point, one fault, one error, one misplayed ball can be the undoing of a match. The thing you never want to hear from the chair umpire if you have just missed a shot is, “Game, Set, Match.” That means you just lost. It is in that moment, like Roger Federer in the 2008 Wimbledon final, and again in the 2009 Australian Open final, one realizes the opportunity for life changing victory has come and gone…and you missed your moment.
There is, however, another moment in a tennis match when the pause button is pressed, and a “do-over” is granted. This can take place on a serve when the ball hits the net and then falls in, or it can happen if some unexpected interruption takes place during a point (another ball rolls on the court during play for example). In the social or club game sometimes a disputed call or a shot too close to call can result in a friendly do-over or “let”. This “let” or do-over in tennis is equivalent to the infamous “Mulligan” in the game of golf.
In golf, country club golf that is, sparring partners can agree to designate one or more do-overs or “Mulligans” for either nine or eighteen holes. Sometimes that Mulligan, as in tennis, can make or brake a golfer’s day on the links. The strategy behind the use of a Mulligan is, of course, critical. Typically, a golfer will use the granted do-over only when a ball has gone seriously out of bounds and no hope for a good shot exists or it will be used when one shot will make the difference in victory or loss. The strategic use of that Mulligan can set up the golfer for enormous flattery or dejection on the 19th hole (clubhouse)!
But what about life? Do we get any Mulligan’s? Are we granted any lets? Moreover, if we could somehow acquire a do-over or two, what event would we choose? Which “shot” would we use that divine “let” on? A marriage proposal? That date we should have asked for? That date we should have said “NO!” to? The job we should have or should not have taken? The hurtful words we spoke in a moment of great stress or pain? The pursuit of title or money at the expense of family? The one night stand? Eating habbits? A lack of exercise? What would you use your “let” on?
Just hitting the 40 year threshold in life, I have been thinking upon this question for a few months now. In my mind’s eye I have reviewed an endless array of possible do-overs. I have wondered how different my life would have looked had I taken a moment to call a “let” at certain big moments. What if I had gone and gotten that back surgery at 18? What if I had courted or married someone else? What if I had not taken that job? What if I had moved there? What if I had pursued that dream more diligently? What if I had a father? What if I took that tennis scholarship? What if I had finished another degree? …The list is seemingly endless. Some “lets” appear to be more important than others, but in reality who knows? Even the smallest of decisions could have made a huge difference in where I am now, who I am now. But that is somehow not the point I have come to realize. This is the life I have, like it or lump it.
As I was pondering this issue recently, on a quiet Sunday morning, very early, crossing the world’s longest bridge, taking in the sunrise and still waters while taking my son to the airport to fly out for soccer camp, and preparing for services in which I was to lead prayer later that morning, my son and I heard an interesting story on NPR. The interviewer was chatting with the author of a book entitled “Do-Overs”. Robin Hemley, still carrying the weight of his many marred and broken childhood realities, decided at the age of forty-eight, to use his self-granted “do-overs”. His idea, now a book, was to go back and re-do a number of experiences which have impacted him for life. Robin chose to go back to Kindergarten to try and relive, or rather un-live, a very tough experience he suffered at the hands of his terrorist Kindergarten teacher, a woman later committed to an institution, who apparently, had it in for Robin. He also chose to go back and use a do-over for his prom. In this case, his desire was to finally ask the girl he “should have asked” many years earlier to go to the dance with him, the one he watched through the windows of the high school as she danced with others. These and many other do-overs, according to his thinking, would be the gateway to a new lease on life, finally.
Robin’s idea is an intriguing one isn’t it? Who among us does not, after all, have a few (quite a few in reality) experiences stored away which prompt us to long for the do-overs or “lets”? The girl in the airport I should have ventured a conversation with, the barista I should have extended a clear hand of compassion to, the kid I should have encouraged more, the talent I should have developed, … But, here we are, where we are, and with many a wort and wonder en tote. How do we process it all? How can we look at the past through the appropriate lens, assess the present as it should be assessed, and look forward properly and enthusiastically to the future? Does a meaningful view of the present and a hopeful view of the future require a re-do on the past? Can we now take that “let”? Should we?
This is a critical question for all of us I would suggest. Moreover, the divine perspective on this one can utterly alter how we live and how we move forward with our lives. It can make all the difference in how we relate, who we relate to, why we make certain choices, and on and on. As Robin Hemley came to find out through his voyage into the past, the past is the past, and all that has happened is a part of us. Now matter how hard we try, and regardless of how deeply we crave it, the past will not change. In reality, Robin did not actually do anything over, he merely did something else. He did not become 5 or 18 again, as much as he would like to have. We cannot go back either. Further, even it we could change the past, we would make other poor decisions or other bad things would happen to us outside of our control which would make us only hunger for new do-overs. There are not enough Mulligans or Lets available for the faults and misadventures of humankind.
So, what is the divine perspective? What does God’s view of the brokenness of our past offer us? I think the answer is found in the New Testament book of Romans. In the eight chapter of that book the author confronts all of our failures and all of life’s tough spots head on. Its an amazing read that addresses anything and everything one could imagine happening in a lifetime. Loss, persecution, anger, rage against us, death, supernatural forces coming against us, things we control, things we don’t control…you name it, its there. In fact, let’s take a quick look at it here: Romans 8:31-39
What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 33 Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised— who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36As it is written,
”For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”
37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Anything missing there that has effected your life? Is your Kindergarten teacher’s rage and emotional frailty on that list? Your prom? Your marriage? Your divorce? Your failed job? Your plunge into addiction? Your sense of uselessness? Your terminal illness? Your parent’s abuse? A rape? An amputation? Job loss? Car accident? Death of a spouse? Its all there.
What is important to note here is that the writer does not bring a word or methodology for hope through some sort of “let”, Mulligan, or do-over. Quite the contrary. In this critical life passage from the scriptures the writer offers an entirely shocking perspective. In these things, God works! The original language actually offers the following sense, “As a result of these very things, in and through these events, or because of these events God is doing His thing!” The reality of scripture, and the hope of salvation is that no matter what we encounter in life, God is bigger, and He is actually using those very events for our good! That is a remarkable suggestion for a “What if?” world. The very events I despise, cower to, run from, and am haunted by, God is able to use in order to bring about good things. How the heck?!
What the writer is not suggesting, and what I am not saying, is that we should take events, happenings, and failures of the past lightly. Our motto should not be, “I don’t regret any of it!” I cringe every time I hear such a phrase from those who have lived utterly immoral lives and have “found faith”. We are to grieve over our failings and the failings of others. We are to see them for what they are. And we are to hunger for an existence more in keeping with God’s best. God abhors all that robs His world and His children of the very best. We must see things as they are, otherwise, we remain unchanged and we are destined to do the same thing over and over. That’s the do-over spiral which no soul can endure joyfully. That’s the do-over which destines us to a life lived apart from God’s purposes and intimate presence. That is the definition of a living hell. We must see the failings as failings. But we do not stop there. More importantly, God does not leave us there.
Rather than a do-over or let, what the scriptures offer us is a Cover Over and a way to Cross Over to a new reality. Not a cover up, but rather the covering of grace given to us by God in Jesus Christ through the despised event of the Cross. The cross offers the bridge to a renewed heart and future. Even the singular most unjust and horrific event in history, the horrid prosecution against the planet’s only perfect Man, becomes for us, the actual event which does the most good. That is Romans 8:31-39 explained. That is the message of the Gospel. That is the lens through which we are to view all of our less than perfect realities. The message of Jesus Christ, who works all things in our lives for His good and our ultimate good, is that all of our life events are reprocessed in the light of salvation. All of our moral failings can become instruments of good if we learn from them, and allow God to use them. His change in us can be used to demonstrate how amazing is His handiwork in the lives of real people. We can be bulletin boards of His grace and truth. Here is who we were, now look at who He has made us! To Him be glory!
Those missed moments we should have seized, God re-routes toward His agenda for us. The moments we pursued the wrong things He can redirect along a pathway to great growth. Far from being a fatalist view of life, this understanding of the truth enables us to run vigorously to God’s plan while acknowledging we will never get it all right, and secures in us the hope that God is always working on our behalf amidst our imperfections. Those who truly understand this never respond, “Then I can live like I wish!” Rather, grace understood properly, by those living in its reality, provides the fuel to run through life with wild and untamed passion toward all that God desires for us. Someone who truly knows Him cannot make an insignificant nod toward the plans He has for us. The love of God for us is to ignite our souls to pursue Him in a heart of love-infused devotion. Salvation is not a “get out of hell free card”, its a living reality of being recreated internally in His image…its about becoming truly whole.
One of the foremost highlights of the life of grace is the understanding that our sins are covered, our past redeemed, and our future secured. The prom activities we should not have pursued, the woman or man in Vegas we should not have entertained, the children we should not have abandoned, the job we should not have taken, the words we should not have spoken, the events we could not control, …it can all be given Godly significance. If you have found yourself wondering what you could have done differently or if your current state is less than you had hoped for, look to God and ask what purposes He has for you in this place, this time, in your life. Allow Him to whisper His assurance and ability to redeem what has been lost, and to usher you forth in confidence for the future. Its not a do-over you really need. For each of us it is a soul-makeover which is required. The more we are made into the person He wants us to be the more we find the ability to live life less prone to craving do-overs or “lets”. Let it be. It happened. Hear his message in the midst of your pain. Take His hand, turn away, and move on with Him.
The message of the Gospel is big enough for the most desperate of lives. Even King David, God’s chosen man, Israel’s greatest king, the man the bible refers to as “A man after God’s own heart”, when confronted with his sin with Bathsheba, and in the throws of the enormous pain that ensued, could not apply a do-over and go back. What was true for Him is true for us. We must stand with our soul naked before God, admit our failings, and then cry out to God in hopeful anticipation of being renewed. As David came to see, it is His presence that makes all the difference. God alive in us, that is our covering for all of our disappointment and failure. A new wife won’t do it, a new house won’t fix it, another big deal won’t cure the cravings of your soul. Only God fits that bill. Most of our perceived need for do-overs stem from our losing sight of this reality, as David did. Our souls only dance, truly, to the music of God. When you are about to make that next wrong decision remind yourself of this truth and you may just save yourself a desire for another Mulligan. And when you do fail again, and you will, learn from it, give it to God, accept His provision of grace, and then allow it to be re-routed for good.
In all these things, we are more than conquerors through Christ Jesus!! Game, Set, Match…you win through Him! Like Roger Federer, though the big losses hurt, we can live to fight, and win, and make history, another day! The Chair Umpire has ruled in our favor once and for all!!
Let Him win you over today,
Bruce Smith (optimuslife.org)
soulstormsite.com
blog.optimuschoice.com
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3. June 2009 by BruceSmith.
Which Way Is Up?! Finding one’s way out of the trap of hedonism. (PG 13)
The scenes are played out untold times a day all across our country. Somewhere, on some typical suburban street, in a typical modern city, the following takes place. A husband or a spouse awakes to another day of reality which they have come to embrace as domestic boredom, an unfulfilled life. Having finally reached the tipping point, and after many false starts, near starts, or broken starts, he or she has come to a “decision” on the future. Rather than remain in a situation that is less than emotionally, relationally, physically, or otherwise “exciting”, a new life is pursued. Said husband or wife leaves a note, holds a “family talk”, or just packs a bag and walks away from a spouse and children to step forward into a journey of new experiences. New relationships, new desires, new pursuits, with no boundaries, no naysayers, no restrictions, no time constraints, …no worries. Life is looking UP now! Or so it is thought.
What those who pursue such courses of action fail to realize is a bit more sobering. The silver screen, magazine photos, beer ads, Vegas tourism promotions, and sit-coms don’t give the full picture. While the butterflies and emotional highs of new love affairs and new vistas appear to promise the world on a string, in reality, a storm is just around the next corner. That storm may take many forms, but it is a storm indeed. Moreover, the emotional, psychological, and personal harm done to children involved is beyond description. The attempts to “show up” for the kids and offer prizes and entertainment galore never replace the sense of loss and crushed hope which resides in the hearts of children and teenagers. And the emotional havoc and sense of failure don’t just subside.
Trading real life for a fantasy just never is quite so fantastic. Eventually, everyone comes to realize this, but sadly, many just try to mask the reality and fool everyone around. Eventually, the refusal to see life as it is leads to all sorts of emotional and psychological distortion and misery. What begins as a thirst for “more” ends in more baggage, chaos and loss. One day, he or she “awakens” again, only this time, the eyes are opened to the huge chasm between what should have been and what is. The years of denial and bitterness take a toll too heavy to imagine. Some, decades later, wind up bearing the weight of a totally misguided and wasted life. The pursuit of a career, a name, a ceaseless pleasure quest don’t end in fulfillment. Read the paper.
The gruesome reality in this scenario is that our culture views this kind of decision making as trading “up”. We are told by nearly every form of media, entertainment, and academics that we are all free to do and to please ourselves at every turn regardless of what that may bring for the future. Our addiction to self and our “individual rights” has led us to abandon all form of reason in pursuit of self gratification. If it feels good, at the moment, do it! Don’t worry about the next moment. Just live in the now. Get what you can while you can! That’s the cultural motto, unspoken or not.
In another part of America, not too far from you and I, yet another common scenario unfolds. Again, the promise and the unfolding reality are in stark contrast. In this scenario a young boy or girl, enamored with the idea of a glamorous life and seeing their name in lights, flees the coup upon graduation in pursuit of life’s Holy Grail: fame. Seeing the daily onslaught of public exposure and fanfare, this young person is led to believe that all of life comes to an individual once fame is attained. Homes, cribs, bling, “stacks of paper”, cars, parties, and personal attendants…these are what life is all about! This is the promise. Truth be told, the allure of this promise captures more than just young people. TV ratings suggest our culture is enamored with this quest.
Yet again, however, the payoff is not quite what is hoped for. Surely, there are a few who manage all the excess and keep life in perspective. Yet, as all of the periodicals and news reports demonstrate, too few seem to be able to navigate these waters of fame well. Far more often than not the preoccupation with self leads celebrities (and those somehow attached to them) to a distorted sense of self importance and value. Convinced their value lies in their exposure, the insatiable hunger for attention eats away at a clear sense of reality. Our value, surely, must be found in more than our “name”. But in Hollywood, the name, and its current buzz, are everything. With over one million “aspiring” actors in the Hollywood area, reportedly, it would appear that there are many a frustrated “unknowns”. For far too many, this state of being “unseen” is a land of oblivion. It serves as a metaphor for many others outside of the entertainment industry as well, many who have lived life just hungering to make a name for themselves somehow, some way.
Because we are created as relational beings, we long to know and to be known. In some capacity, the explosion of Facebook and Myspace and other social networks are a manifestation of our innate desire to be connected in meaningful ways. However, when our understanding of what it means to know and to be known is distorted, we merely settle for having our name out there. The misplaced thirst for more and more people to “know” who we are leads us toward this hunger for fame. The irony is that, in most cases, the more “well known” a person is in terms of celebrity, the ability for them to be truly known is diminished. Every human interaction becomes, for them, an exercise in public relations. Further, the inner public relations battle which rages within them makes it very difficult to relate to people on a truly human and loving level. For many, the inebriation with the public persona overtakes the real humanity. For the one who has achieved “success” thus defined, a loss of soul can ensue. The roles, and the public acceptance of them, can overtake the human being. Once they have made it “up” there, the truth sets in. That truth, as the addictions, relational madness, suicide attempts, and counseling statistics of the stars suggests, is not so lovely.
These are but two scenarios, and countless others could be offered. The path up we search for takes many forms; the one who chooses to find relief in a pill, a bottle, a needle, in a fitful attempt to get “up” high; the girl or woman who jumps from one bed to another hoping one day to really be “known”; the boy or man filled with rage and bitterness who knows no way “up” but to fight, cheat, destroy any that would appear to be hinderances to his advancement… The scenes are endless, but all the same in the end.
The point here is not to call out those that have fallen in marriage or to call out those who have pursued fame and success, or anyone else. Rather, the truth offered is that which calls us to consider what life is really about in the end. As the movie UP, a great movie in my view, suggests, life is more about the quality of our everyday human exchanges than it is about the pie in the sky dream life we think up. If we are obsessed with all the stuff we long to do and the name we wish to attain, we miss the joys, beauty, and wonder of everyday life. When we choose escapism through endless temporary pleasures and various “highs” we miss out on real peace and soul satisfaction. Such pleasure ultimately leads to boredom of the soul and eventually emotional burnout.
Skipping out on family in order to find ourselves leads to immense loss. The loss of everyday wonder cannot be replaced by any thing the world offers. Trade your family for your own journey and you will miss out on moments you will never get again. You miss the everyday smile of a small child. The smirk of a teenage girl caught somewhere between childhood and womanhood. The uncertain bravado of a teenage boy trying to find himself. The tenderness of siblings learning to love each other. The cattiness of a teenage girl gone mad because she has “nothing to wear” despite the endless parade of clothes which fill drawers, closets, bathroom floors, and the underworld beneath the bed. Hugh Hefner and all the other iconic serial hedonists of our day may offer the perception of fun and unending pleasure, but if you looked a little more closely you would find emotional, mental, psychological and relational disasters, not to mention soul weariness which staggers the mind. It does not work. Pleasure can never trump goodness and a life filled with honest, sincere, and soul inspiring love. Moreover, true pleasure comes only in the context of true goodness. Beauty arises amidst righteousness not perversion and pretense.
What the “girls next door” want you to believe (amidst their own sinking voyage and in order that they might get paid) is that they have found the pinnacle of life. Yet, in the moments when they are forced to really look at themselves, not the silicone enhanced, lip injected, bleached, and liposucked version, …what they really see is that little girl who has always longed to be known and loved as a human being with honest aspiration and a desire for relationship. Not too many, to my knowledge, grew up with the aspiration of becoming a physical toy used up for the pleasure and enjoyment of men, and increasingly women, who see only a way to fulfill their lusts. Surely life offers more fulfillment than that for a woman.
So, we must ask ourselves as we wander on the seas of distorted messages and imagery. In a world where most on the planet have less than 10% of what we have in America, a world where millions have no clean water, suffer from horrible disease, die starving, and have no help, we must ask ourselves if the American crush on pleasure and self is really what life is all about. What have we traded? Far too much. But what now? How does one escape the pleasure ride to darkness? How does one who has ridden the fun train to emptiness find the will to get off and find another way home?
Look around, look within. Are you aching for something? Is that next party you have lined up going to fix you? Is that woman across the room, full of allure and savage sexuality going to be there for you when you break down, fail, wonder if you are worthy as a real man? Is that pile of powder going to finally stem the tide of that emotional tsunami that has been there your entire life? Is the next enhancement going to make you ultimately desirable to that one who will ride off into the sunset with you and make your life perfect? Are you going to put on your tombstone, “I went to an A List party and it made my life complete!” Is the next fling in a hotel while on business trip really the last one? Will you ever really be able to come home after a night out with the boys or girls and look your family in the eye guilt free? Wake up.
What does a man or woman do when the sudden appearance of reason strikes on the scene out of nowhere, amidst the party, drink in hand, lusts aflame, and with all the hungers of hedonism raging? The thing to do, along with the Prodigal Son, is to take note of your empty state, your squandered life, and turn back in the direction of your Father.
The striking truth of the Gospel is as real for Hugh Hefner as it is for Mother Theresa. Without Christ both are lost. In the former case, the one has neglected that reality for far too long and has tried to hide from the truth amidst the lie of fame. Fame for what? Convincing women, young girls, teenage boys, and an entire culture that a pair of great breasts and a vagina make a female worthy of some value? Who really wants that on their tombstone? The latter, having realized life was more than the pursuit of self earlier in life, gave of her self, her female self, to build a world for a few that would speak of the marvelous wonder of grace and compassion. Which of us has ever been more inspired by Playboy than by Mother Theresa? Which life lifts the human heart? What quality of character are we more apt to long for? Which of us, with our minds, hearts and souls intact, would rather spend a day with a “girl next door” rather than Mother Theresa? Are you kidding me?! Please. That is an easy trade.
If you are looking for a life with an upward trajectory, let me strongly urge you to look UP, UP indeed. If you look around at your surroundings and you are lost in the heap of moral waste, wake UP! That emptiness, that hole you are attempting to fill will never be filled with another party, another pay check, another accolade, another man, another woman, another toy, another trick, another hit, another trip, or another anything outside of Christ. He has said, and He meant what He said, “I am THE way, THE truth, and THE life.” No one finds the way to real life, He asserted, apart from Him. Try as you might, it will not happen. He may not offer you the girl next door, a party every night, or your name in lights for all to see. But, rest assured, what He offers is of far greater value than those temporary traps. He may bring you to the world of the arts, but it will be to showcase His attributes in a world that needs them desperately. He may give you untold success, but be careful to use it for His agenda, otherwise, the riches will own you and master you. He may give you physical beauty or wed you to physical beauty, but be reminded, such beauty comes from the creative hand of a wondrous gift-giving God, and you were created for relationship with that beauty. The true beauty unfolds with him or her when you know her/him, and are fully known yourself. That happens as love grows apart from the bedroom. As the knowledge of each other grows so does the wonderment and ecstasy, undefiled, of the bedroom, as a celebration of the relationship God has granted. We tend to crave a cheap substitute when it comes to sexuality. God created it. It just makes sense that it comes fully alive within his plan. Outside of His plan we only find distortion, distraction, dirt, and debris.
The upward life, friends, is lived as we find ourselves in Him. As Augustine has suggested, we will find no rest until we find ourselves in Him. We were created for Him. We were created for relationship. We cannot understand the wonder of life and the beauty of relationship apart from Him. That vacation of the soul we so desperately seek, is found only along the shoreline of God’s plan for our lives. Try to get there any other way than the course He has drawn out for us, and, like the victims on the Titanic, amidst the sounds of safety and the blissful ignorance of reality, you will wreck your life, your soul, and your eternity.
There is a way up. That is the good news. He stands ready to lead you there. Take Him up on His offer. You will never be the same.
Bruce Smith
optimuslife.org
blog.optimuschoice.com
soulstormsite.com
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