You Blew it! …now own it
John Wooden, the great basketball coach at UCLA, just passed after 99 years of leadership. One of his memorable quotes sets the stage for today’s blog. He said, “Who you are as a person is much more important than what you are as a basketball player”.
On the front page of the USA Today, this morning, I read the story of a blown call, a major league blown call, literally. In all of baseball history there have only been 20 perfect games ever pitched. 20. That is staggeringly few in light of the years and number of total games–do the math. That, and other factors related to this story, make this story of a blown call something to talk about…and learn from.
To set it up, and to properly understand the magnitude of the event you need some facts. So here they are. The Detroit pitcher, Armando Galarraga, was a rather average pitcher to this point. His career, with some high notes, was never anything to bring accolades from the sporting world. That’s what made his perfect game so deeply spectacular and meaningful from his vantage point. He would move from unknown to the history books in an instant, one of a very small elite group in all of baseball history. We can get that. We can understand having a dream and being right there.
The umpire, the one who blew a call and cost Galarraga his chance for history, was a veteran, a good one. He has gotten so many calls right in his time, even close ones. None, as it turns out, would be more important, and have more consequence, than this call. Jim Joyce’s “safe” call, with two outs in the ninth, now, itself, goes down in history for the severity of the error and the drastic consequences for baseball history and the integrity of the game.
Joyce, the veteran, and Galarraga, the previous unknown, have each handled the situation with grace and inspiring courage. Typically, this would have been the opportunity for tirades, outbursts, insults, attacks, interviews, venomous character assaults, and many other ego driven realities. Likely, for many, it would also have turned into an all hands on deck defensive strategy by the one who blew it.
Fans all across the baseball world are weighing in, sportscasters are having a field day, and the call for instant replay in MLB has been renewed. But can what took place actually be undone? The commissioner has said, “No.” What took place stands, and the perfect game did not take place. How sad. How deflating. How crushing for both the offended and the offender. Can you imagine living with the guilt, the weight of this for the rest of your umpiring career? Can you imagine living your retirement knowing the record books will never show how you shined in that moment? Wow. What do you share with your grandkids? “Hey, here is the ball that would have been the ball that showed I pitched a perfect game, but…” Or, “Yes, Jimmy, I’m the guy who blew that call 40 years ago…”
But look at the paper today. On the heels of this epic blunder, the pitcher and the umpire met on the field again. Can you imagine what must have been going through those two minds?! Well, in this situation, what could have been deeply divisive and utterly ugly, has become a message of inspiration and grace. The pitcher, called by the manager of the Detroit Tigers (that’s what I call leadership…a blog in itself) to walk out the starting lineup to the umpire, Joyce, gracefully took on the task to meet his offender and was greeted by a tearful and repentant man. Both Galarraga and Joyce, feeling the sting of the situation in their own way, walked a journey of restoration and peace amidst all the calls of others to fan the flames of drama. What a beautiful scene on the backdrop of a testosterone fueled field of battle. Manhood in action does not always play out in brutality and swagger. The measure of a man is most clearly seen in his ability to own, forgive, and walk in humble strength.
The offender, Jim Joyce, openly admitted his fault to the world. He said, without hesitation, that he blew the call and got it totally wrong. He also understood what it cost Galarraga, “I cost that kid a perfect game.” Joyce, by his fault, caused a lifelong pitcher and dreamer to get as close as one can get, then snatched perfection away from him by his own error. But, he owned it. Tearfully, honestly, apologetically, and authentically–he owned it. He did not try to fool himself, his offended, or anyone else. Simply, he owned his failure.
The offended, Armando Galarraga, who had his legitimate perfect game stolen, literally stolen from him, walked off the mound with his head high, his heart full, and his character, love of the game, and drive intact. He knows what he did even if the books never print it. He knows what he earned even if it will not make it into the chronicles on the walls inside the MLB hall of fame in Cooperstown. I played baseball as kid and teenager. I loved the game. I know how hard it is to accomplish such a feat. I cannot imagine getting there and then having someone pull the rug out from underneath a person. Yet, Galarraga walked in forgiveness, contentment, and purity. He saw the error clearly. He did not diminish he had been wronged. Yet, he saw something bigger–humanity.
What we can learn from this story, this journey in sport, and its what I love about sport in general (it is such a profound metaphor for life in so many ways), are the lessons of grace amidst unfairness and hurt. Someone was hurt in this situation. Someone had a part of them diminished. Someone hurt another. Someone failed miserably. But the other side of the story is a call to all of us to own our screw ups, and to walk in grace with others when they fail us.
When you blow it, and blow it big, don’t hide behind defensive games and positioning and violent self-protection. If you do that those closest to you will walk, no, run away from you. Others will abandon you as well. It attracts no one and leads to nothing good. It destroys you as much as it destroys all of your relationships. If you blow it, OWN IT. Like Jim Joyce, look the camera in the eye and say, “I did this. This was my fault. I blew it. I need to do better.” That, done in honesty, authenticity, and integrity, will cause people to support and help you. People can forgive when they see a recognition of your failure, but you must make it known. Other people see it and get it, do you?
When you are the one offended, remember that we are all human, and that statistics are not the goal. Life, human interaction, is not about the records keeping, its about community, relationships, joy in the journey, and about people. If you are offended don’t measure your contentment by the revenge you get. Don’t chase others down to share your disgust about the offender. Don’t look for your chance to get even or get one up on the enemy. Remember, the grace of God was extended to you amidst your ugliness. How can you withhold grace from another? You can and should be aware of the failure, you can be careful not to put your hand in that fire again, but you must walk forward in grace and lovingkindness. When offended remember that it is the love of God that draws us all to repentance. Remember that at the end of the day it does not matter who is right or wrong, it matters that hearts are in right relationship to God and to others.
Wholeness in life, love, business, relationships of all sorts, comes from a heart of honest recognition, gracious response, and authenticity before God and others. The quality of our character comes through amidst the tough stuff. Who you are is made evident when the calls don’t fall in your favor. Walk forward and greet all the challenges with poise, purpose and the love of God. Many are watching. Many are hoping we can raise the game to another level.
Have your blown it? Own it.
Has your heart been blown up by the actions of another? Walk in grace.
Bruce Smith, Optimuslife.org