Dear Bruce, …Help me find “normal”.

8. August 2008 by BruceSmith.

Dear Bruce,

I have been a believer now for about three years.  Before I came to faith I was, I guess, the typical modern person living from experience to experience, day to day, pleasure to pleasure, moment to moment.  Before I was a Christian I would just hang with my friends, go to a bar, experiment with various chemicals, “enjoy” sex, and just kinda live with a “If its what I want at the moment…I do it” sort of mindset.  Over the last three years, as a believer, I have found that my guidelines for living have become “abnormal” in the eyes of all my previous friends.  People tend to view me now as abnormal.  I don’t like the way that feels, but I do want to live like God desire me to live.  How do I make sense of this and process this mental/spiritual ordeal in a prudent way?

Is the Christian life about being abnormal?  Do I always have to look like the sore thumb in every “fun” situation?  What am I missing here?

Thanks for your insight,

Katie

Katie,

I love your honesty, transparency, and willingness to ask what many people deal with but never really voice.  Essentially, your question gets to the core of the faith walk, its motivation, its essence, and its aim.  Here is the good news: believers are the most “normal” people on earth!  For most of us, we tend to lose sight of the biblical call to “normal” in light of the scriptures which encourage us as “aliens” in this world.  We tend to see that the believer is called to be “different” from the rest of the world, but fail to realize that this difference takes us back to where God’s intentions began for humanity.

Let me explain.

What most of the world views as normal actually is severely abnormal, marred, broken.  In a recent Newsweek article I noticed a striking example of this reality.  Apparently Newsweek regularly runs a piece that is sort of a meter or gauge of cultural realities.  The piece actually is nothing more than a scale, drawn out like a time-line, with one side showing a moderate rating and on the far end an excessive rating.  In this particular issue the scale was evaluating the degree of moral failure in three particular current events.  On the moderate end, which was merely listed as morally “tacky” was Alex Rodriguez’s “serial adultery” which has been brought out in the Yankee star’s divorce filing.  On the “mid-level” scale the indicator pointed to Martin Bashir’s (a news co-anchor with one of the major network news shows) recent “caveman”-like, sexually laced comments about a certain popular female.  His comments were merely a joke it seems, but deemed more offensive than serial adultery.  On the severe end of moral failure, listed as a gross breech of morality and decency, and thought to be unthinkable, was a politically driven song by Ludacris which promotes Obama’s campaign.  The Newsweek article, this moral scale, suggests that the most offensive form of immorality in our culture, at this moment in our national development, is anything which would bring any hint of damage to a certain politician’s campaign.  In the writer’s opinion, apparently, despite the fact that Ludacris was actually promoting Obama, any hinted association between the rapper and Mr. Obama could only serve to damage rather than aid Obama’s campaign.  Such an act, unwarranted promotional evil, even though it’s intention was to aid the potential President, was viewed as the “wort kind of evil” by the magazine!  This is absolutely heinous and unforgivable in the eyes of the writer.

What I am getting at here is simply this; how the world views morality is not how God views morality.  We are called to see what God views as normal as normal.  In a world that places more value on successful political campaigns than it does marital fidelity, believers must have a much clearer view of how people are to live.  No party or political platform was ever intended to, nor can it, define ultimate reality.  Likewise, the general opinion of a culture is never to be our benchmark for living.  Though the average moral scale may appeal to the majority to be the best way to go, we must recognize that in reality such a guideline is abnormal.

Getting back to normal, something I have written at length about, is all about understanding why we were created and how we find the greatest sense of meaning, purpose, and peace in life.  That kind of life comes from an understanding of who God made us to be and how He intends for us to function.  While your friends may view sexual “freedom” and partying as the way to “happiness”, you must recognize that such an approach leads you far away from a life worth living as defined by God.  The proof is in the puddin, as they say.  In a culture where morals have been in decline for decades, while affluence and entertainment access have been sharply on the rise, we have seen an explosion in rates of depression, addictions, psychological illness, and general human failure.  More people are in counseling and rehab than ever, more relational distress exists, and personal isolation has shot up dramatically by all accounts.  We are not getting happier by experiencing more pleasure it would appear.  How  many high profile celebs must we see destroying their lives before we get the hint.  Life lived for pleasure does not end in pleasure.  For many, such a life, sadly, just ends.  For too many others such an approach to life actually leads to psychological, physical, relational, and moral imprisonment.

Lastly, if you want to see a vivid picture of “normal” with pristine clarity, and the kind of peace, love, and purpose it brings, simply do a study on the life of Christ.  He has been called, simply, Ecce Homo “The Man”.  Finding normal is found in beholding The Man.  He is the definitive look at what it means to be “normal” in God’s eyes.  Normal is what God intended, let’s not forget that.  Anything shy of God’s desire for us is deviant, off the mark, other than normal.  What we were intended to be is the norm from God’s perspective.  That kind of normal leads us to the kind of life we all crave.  Because we are all prone to the abnormal life of  sin quests of all sorts, we wind up less than what we could be.  That’s why Jesus came.  He came to offer a bridge back to normal, the original intention, communion with God, and proper community with others.  If you really want to find normal, study Him, apply the Ten Commandments, and embrace the Sermon on the Mount.  With regard to the latter, has there ever been a more counter-cultural, “abnormal” approach to living on this planet?  Yet, the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus’ great moral presentation, remains the benchmark for true living.

I can attest personally, as one who to some degree has lived an “abnormal” life as defined by society (I have had sex with one partner, my wife, and that only while married, in my lifetime, have never tried a drug of any sort, and desperately attempt to submit my life, thought, and actions to God daily) that the biblical quest for normal is the most fulfilling approach to life.  I am far from perfect, and fail regularly, but my deepest drive is to be all God has called me to be.  I am a single father of three, love parenting, and thoroughly enjoy my kids more than all other pursuits or activities.  I refuse to embrace any romantic relationship not in keeping with God’s agenda for me, and some time ago I walked away from a job which provided a very large income for me in order to write, speak, and teach others about finding God in a world of distractions.  I have been told regularly, “This is not normal”.  I share these things not to promote any high view of myself, and certainly do not think I have it all together, rather, I offer these realities simply to let you know, as a guy who could be viewed as completely “abnormal” by the cultural standard of measurement, that this kind of life is more thrilling, enjoyable, and purpose-filled than I could ever explain fully.  I am convinced that the pursuit of God is the quest for normal.  Anything else makes me less whole.  I have seen that it is the good life and it is worth pursuing.

Normal is found in Him.  Embrace, enjoy, and live in that reality and watch as your life becomes more than you could ever imagine.  Dare to be normal in His eyes!

Pursuing true normal,

Bruce Smith

optimuslife.org

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What color are your stretchy pants, Hero?

6. August 2008 by BruceSmith.

Below, is a somewhat lengthy article/essay I wrote on the heels of the Spiderman 3 movie.  In the wake of the new Batman movie, which is breaking all records in moviedom, I thought it would be a good time to consider, again, what it means for us to apsire to the “heroic life”.  I am intrigued by the whole hero genre and believe that as a culture we are drawn to this form of entertainment because it resonates with something deep within us.  We all hope to be bigger than life in some sense.  That is, we all desire to live above and beyond the normal every day drudgery and banality we see around us.  We all aspire to be and do more good.  Yet, we all face the darkness, bitterness, and the crushing weight of our moral weakness which lurks in the depths of our being.  These themes are highlighted with great clarity in many of the superhero scripts of our time and they capture us.  I believe this is why Batman, with its great acting performances, script, and plot, is drawing many of us to the theater more than once.  We are drawn to the heroic ideal which Batman portrays, and we are all too familiar with the deep darkness which fuels The Joker.  The very same theme was present in the last Spiderman flick as Spidey wrestled with the drive for heroism and darkness within himself.

I hope you will take the time to read the following article on finding the hero life within, and living the kind of heroic life we all aspire to.  While it was written some time ago, it is relevant today, especially in light of the recent buzz over Batman.  The Jack Black fans out there will appreciate the look into the heroic ideal brought out in the movie Nacho Libre!  Enjoy the read.

 

What Color Are Your Stretchy Pants?

By Bruce Smith, author of Soul Storm

www.soulstormsite.com

 

Have you ever thought about what it must be like to be Super Human?  Great?  Super Good?  Exceptional?  Uniquely important to the world?

Spiderman 3 has just blown past all former records for the largest opening weekend in box office sales at theatres in the United States.  For the record, I thought the first two films were the better movies.  That being so, Spidey 3 still inspires the wanna-be superhero in me.  Even the third installment of the webbed wonder boy’s adventures stirs me enough to want to put on my own stretchy pants.

In the last couple of years I have thought much about the whole superhero thing.  It seems, if Hollywood’s success with hero-adventure movies is any clue that many in America and around the world think about the heroic ideal. Why is this?  What is it about heroes, superheroes, and other marvel working caped types which draw us so intently?  I think I am beginning to understand. 

Several months ago, in my home, a curious encounter and a really silly, but really great movie brought this issue into sharp focus for me as I was wrestling with who God has made me and what He is calling me to be and do with my life. 

Here is what happened. 

 

“Dear God!  No.  Not this!”  And then, “Son, what in the world are you watching?”  These are the words I spoke late one night, not too long ago, after walking in on my teenage son watching the unthinkable on the television in his room. 

As a guy, you might think I should be a bit more understanding, a little less shocked.  After all, I was a teenager once.  And yes, the testosterone raged in me as well.  However, as a father, devoted to God, striving to instill Christian values in my son, this type of behavior came as a major blow. 

It is one thing to wrestle with one’s own demons.  It is something quite different to be rudely awoken to the reality that your offspring, your only son, has demons you prayed incessantly he would never have to deal with.  Walking into my son’s room that night, hearing the moans, slaps, and other sounds of fleshly activities, it was all so unbearable.  To see my son mesmerized by these kinds of primal urges displayed in Technicolor on the tube was a blow unlike few I had experienced as a father.  The sweating bodies, the shirtless participants, and the raw, uninhibited interaction were enough to make me crazy with fear and anger.  How could my son, the one I had groomed for years to pursue a thoughtful and restrained life, be given to this kind of immorality? 

“This is garbage!” I thought to myself.  Instantly, fear of my son’s future and lifelong addiction consumed me.  I looked at my son as a disappointed obedience trainer would look at an obstinate Labrador, and yelled, “Wrestling!  You are watching wrestling!  Turn that mindless garbage off right now, son!  Don’t you know this is why America is in the moral abyss it is in?  Just because the rest of the country watches this crap, doesn’t mean we watch this junk in our home.  We have higher standards in this house.  Turn it off, pick up a book and expand your mind.  Don’t make me take this television out of your room!”

Not too many moments later I remembered how, as a young kid, I absolutely loved JYD (The Junk Yard Dog).  I realized that my son’s longing to be the big bold super-figure was also mine. 

The desire still lurks.  In fact, it is growing.  What I find, as I draw closer to God’s heart, is that the hunger to be a human hero grows.

 

A few months after this incident my son and I were watching Jack Black’s movie Nacho Libre together, laughing hysterically, and cheering for Nacho as he pursued his dream, his calling.  Soon thereafter, my testosterone fueled son and I were shopping for our stretchy pants and scratching the superhero itch deeply rooted within us.  His color of choice was red, mine was blue.  Don’t laugh.  As Nacho reminds us, “Sometimes a guy likes to wear stretchy pants.  It’s for fun”.  We have yet to find the knee high wrestling boots.

Life can be fun.  It can actually be adventurous when we find ourselves and pursue that for which we were created.  Nacho Libre, a somewhat goofy movie, finds its strength in the deep seated passion of it principal character to “find himself” and his quest to pursue his dream, his divinely inspired dream.  That dream is, in essence, the same dream that each person who lives and breathes has in his or her heart.  This dream is actually our consuming passion to know why we are here and what we should be doing with our lives.  Finding this dream sets one on the path of exhilaration.  The loss of this dream leads to the kind of individual and communal misery and emptiness with which we are too familiar. 

This quest for the “ideal” in our life is, I think, what captures us so much as we watch movies like Spiderman, Batman, and yes, Nacho Libre.  We all want to know that we can BE GREAT.  Intuitively, we seem to understand that we were created for something more than the life we are living.  Mediocrity is just not enough.  Spiderman, ultimately, stirs that hunger within us to dream about what life would look like if we were able to cast off our meager existence and embrace a bigger dream, a dream for the Best Life God has for us.

 

Settling for less than Best:  the Black Suit

 

Spiderman 3 brings the reality of good vs. evil into fantastic light.  This battle of forces, one against the other, rages in each of us.  What is so compelling about Spidey 3 (though again, I liked the first two better), is the plot twist which demonstrates that even the best among us, the super figures among us, wrestle with the less than honorable impulses which reside in the depths of one’s heart and mind. 

The struggle for Spiderman, for Nacho, and for us, is the same.  The daily battle to embrace the easy way, the alluring way, and often, the dark way, tugs at each one of us.  As the movie demonstrates, our cravings for vengeance, recognition, flattery, respect, and ego scream out for their fulfillment.  It is so much easier to give into the pull of the black suit, isn’t it?  When we lose focus the dark side is always there to wrap itself around us and shackle us to its destructive ways. 

What about this black suit though?  How is it that we are so drawn to it?  Why was Spidey so tempted to leave the promise of the red suit and its good deeds for the empty offerings of the dark side?  In truth, his struggle has been the struggle of humanity since Adam and Eve.  That original breaking of boundaries unleashed the tide of darkness that still runs ramped in our world.  The doctrine of original sin is a common sense reality.

Scripture has suggested to us that the pursuit of godliness is the key to an abundant life, and the key to a successful defense against the darkness of our own hearts. David, the greatest king of Israel, amidst his fame, riches, power and privilege, found this reality to be so.  When David submitted to the black suit and found himself in the throws of adultery and murder his soul was wrecked and the carnage worked its way through his family.  When David found his passion directed toward the heart of God he found a life so full of beauty, artistic expression, and glory that few in history have been able to capture the thrill of living with such singleness of vision as David did.  The Psalms are replete with amazing testimonies of David’s intimacy with God and still capture the hearts, minds, and souls of readers thousands of years later.

The “promise” of the black suit is unveiled in our day in vivid detail on television news nightly.  It shows up in the voice mail messages of raging celebrity fathers, the jail sentences of gorgeous, empty, drunk, party animal actresses, and on the videos of stammering-drunk celebrity fathers video-taped by their young daughters.  The “promise” of the black suit shows up in our own lives in the wreckage inflicted upon ourselves when we make poor choices morally, relationally, and otherwise.  The “promise” of the black suit shows its power to be deadly when our college and high school campuses are plagued by mass killings.  The “promise” of the black suit is shown to be false each and every day if we are willing to view life realistically.  Anna Nicole, John Belushi, and many a lost rock star or movie star tell us of the “promise” of the dark side.  Likewise, the demise of many well-known preachers, evangelists, and political leaders speak to us of the remains of life lived in the black suit.

The scriptures compel us, “Come, let us reason together”.  Is it reasonable to choose our own desires and ideas when God offers us a clear plan for right living?  Is it reasonable to embrace lust, sex without boundaries, greed, revenge, limitless pleasure, and selfish ambition, when God has already instructed us as to the results that will be obtained?

If we are to abandon the trap of the black suit, as Spiderman ultimately did, we must choose to change our focus.  The word repentance, scripturally, denotes a putting down of one thing and a choosing of another.  It is a turning from one direction and a traveling toward another.  To repent is not to “confess” a laundry list of rules broken every now and then; rather, it is a conscious decision to live in a different manner.  More directly, it is a decision to allow oneself to be made into a different person.  We cannot do this.  Only God can work this kind of miracle.  We must however, say to Him, “I am tired of the black suit.  Please, change me and put another suit on me”. 

Just as Spiderman eventually came to see how entrapped he was by the all-consuming desires he was prisoner to while in the black suit, we must recognize that in the end the patterns of living the selfish life are methodically robbing us of our true selves and all we can be.  The questions arises, then, “How do we escape?”

 

 A New Suit:  Becoming something new

 

Psalms 27:4 reads, “One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek:

that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,

to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek Him in His temple.  

 

Our ability to put on a new suit, a red suit in the case of Spidey, depends upon our focus and desire.  As the Psalmist indicates here, the consuming passion which anchors the soul is that which is bigger, better, and beyond anything this world can offer.  If all of life, real life, meaningful life, is reduced to one quest, it must be, as the Westminster Confession asserts, the quest to know, love, and enjoy God forever.  Nothing else in all of human experience compares to this experience.  No beauty, even that of a man or woman, the crown of God’s creation, can compare to the beauty of the Lord. 

David found this to be so.  Smitten by the beauty of an enthralling, and married, woman, whom he viewed as she bathed, he chose to disregard the safety and protection of the God fearing King’s robe, and made a conscious choice to disrobe himself from God’s agenda and pursue her.  In the end, a Hamlet-like scene unfolded.  Beauty is to be pursued, beauty as defined by God.  Not all men, women, careers, or opportunities are God’s plan for us, no matter how attractive they may be to us.

I love beautiful things.  In the past I have been a part of interior design businesses.  I have bought and sold art, collected vintage watches, bought and sold fine furnishings, and pursued the hobby of photography.  Beauty and design speak to me.  I believe we were created with an attraction to beauty because God, in His very nature, is beauty defined.  Design speaks of a designer.  For me, to walk into, live in, or to help someone design an inspiring environment is pure joy.  The explosion in home decorating and design-shows on television, I think, demonstrates that people in general have an innate sense of structure, design, beauty, and long for a “space” where form comes together.  This is a hint of how life is to be lived.  Who is not captured by the sight of a world-class athlete who has refined the body in amazing ways?  How lovely are those whom God has blessed, male or female, with abundant physical beauty?  Beauty is all around us.  It is there to inspire us and to point us upward.

God has given us a design for life.  A spectacular life unfolds when we put on God’s suit for us and we follow His plan uniquely formed for us.  When we view the artistic beauty of scripture as merely “rules” or “puritanical laws” we sever ourselves from the potential to live a beautiful and inspired life.  Without putting on the super-hero costume, the stretchy pants God intends for each of us, we have no hope of finding a life that thrills us.  Our uniquely designed plan, we must remember, unfolds amidst the safe boundaries of scripture.  Just as Spidey found his most heroic feats performed in his red suit, the suit he was intended to wear, we find the life we were meant to live in our quest to focus on God’s plan for living.  Our benchmark for such a life, is none less than Jesus who said, and literally meant, “I am the way, the truth, and the life.”  God gives us one option because He knows, as the Psalmist found out, that only in Him can we find wholeness, and only in Him can we be made new.

 

 This just makes good sense.  If God does exist, does it not make sense that He would define, construct, or build a framework that His creatures could follow?  A loving God would not allow for 6 billion varying “truths”, differing truths.  How could a good God, with a plan for His creation, extend love, if He provided no roadmap to follow?  Those who wish to embrace the idea that no absolute truth exists, must also embrace an unknowable and unloving deity.  For if no truth, real truth, knowable truth exists, then one persons’ belief in murder on demand cannot be viewed any differently than another’s belief in greed, or another’s belief in polygamy, or another’s belief in pedophilia, or another’s belief in snake handling, or another’s belief in, well, you name it.

God, by definition, is a unique being with a certain set of characteristics.  In finding out who He is, as He has revealed Himself in scripture, we find our blueprint for building a life worth living.  We can never fulfill our thirst to live life to the full short of turning toward God’s way of life.  It must be the one thing that directs all activities, decisions, desires, emotions, and pursuits.  This is how we are made new.  It happens as we surrender ourselves to the superhero of superheroes, the one who gives us power, grace, joy, peace, poise, and overcoming abilities.

God’s word offers us a sure and inspiring hope when we turn from the dark suit and “put on” the new suit He offers us.  In the very moment we open our hearts to Him He creates something new in us.  The scriptures say, “Behold, the old is gone and all things have been made new”.  Just as Spiderman came to realize the destructive chaos associated with the black suit, se we too are called to realize how disjointed and unfulfilling our lives are when detached from God’s artistic plan for us.  In the end, Spiderman found he was able, willing, and ready to “put to death” the darkness within him, and he found a renewed passion to embrace the call of the good suit.  We must do the same.  We cannot hope to achieve this death to the darkness within us that causes us to make destructive choices, however, until and unless we turn to God and ask Him to make us new.

 

Stretchy Pants of your own

 

At the end of the day we all want to know that we matter.  All human beings need to know that they are in some way a unique feature of life on this planet.  Jesus demonstrates just how much we matter in all of His interactions with others.  When those with afflictions were brought to Him and were longing for His touch, He had compassion.  When those who were oppressed by the religious “leaders” of the day were in need of inspiring truth, He gave it.  When the outcasts of society were in need of grace and dignity, He offered it.  And when people who were created to know, love, follow, and enjoy Him made a wreck of their lives as they turned to the way of the world, He brought the hope and power of a changed life. 

So here is the question.  How are you living?  Do you know His plan for you?  Would you know it if it ran you over?  Have you found your own stretchy pants?

In the movie Nacho Libre, Jack Black, plays the part of a man who desperately wants to do something worthwhile with his life.  Apparently, he had come to the realization that life lived the way most people lived it was not enough.  Thus, he decides to commit his life to Godly reflection and service to orphans.  Sounds good enough, right?

The only problem for Nacho is that, while he wants desperately to live a life worth living, he feels somewhat trapped in the monastery.  He wants to serve the kids, but he feels the religious leaders around him have lost all passion, creativity, and beauty.  He wants to be the best he can be, but he feels that his long lost dream to wrestle has left him with a gaping hole in his soul.  And he wants to know the joy of loving a woman, but he feels that the rules of the monastery forbid such human interaction.  What is a man to do?

Eventually, what Nacho comes to find out is that God is not a God “in a box”.  That is to say, God often works in ways that are more creative and unexpected than we could have imagined.  He still works within His clear guidelines as revealed in scripture, but in ways that surprise us.  In contrast to Adam and Eve, who were deceived into thinking that the only way to a fuller life was found beyond the boundaries (this is what the enemy of our souls always tells us), Nacho comes to find that God’s good plans and creative genius are boundless.  He came to see, like Spiderman, that each time we go beyond the lines God has drawn, we only bring pain, confusion and doubt.  And he came to find that embracing God’s unique plan for us can be unexpectedly, humorously, and inspiringly joyous and can reach, lift, and inspire others.

Nacho saw his dark desire to wrestle for fame, fancy ladies, and money transformed into a desire to provide a more adventurous and bountiful life for the orphans.  Likewise, Nacho came to the unexpected realization that the life of an individual pursuing the one thing (as in Psalm 27) we most need is a life beyond anything we could ask or imagine.  Nacho found that his calling was to serve God creatively, authentically, and joyously.  He was able to do so while retaining his priestly robe (a metaphor for the Godly life), all the while wearing his “stretchy pants” (the uniform of the wrestler) underneath.  The metaphor we find here is that of a man who finds his unique gifting and calling and who has been won over by the romance and thrill of Godly living.  As has been suggested, there is nothing so boring and ultimately unfulfilling as separation from God and nothing so lovely and inspiring as orthodoxy (right belief). 

The good news is that God is still in the business of creating such superheroes.  God is still calling and creating individuals who will pursue Him with devotion, passion, humor, and sincerity.  He still wishes to make colorful characters who will serve the interests of others, those who will care for the underprivileged, those who will protect the oppressed, those who will defend the fatherless, those who will care for the widows, those who will mentor the orphans, and those who will do the unexpected and love the unlovely. 

So, what color are your stretchy pants?  Will you ever discover them?  Will you suit up?  Will you take off the black suit that so entraps your life?   Will you put on the new suit God has for you? 

Just as Spiderman suggests, “We all have a choice”.  And as the scripture suggests, “Choose this day whom you will serve”.  Today could very well be the day that defines the rest of your life.  This could be the day you are made into a superhero, a super-lover, a super-forgiver, a super-leader, a super-father, a super-mother, a super-artist, a super-attorney, a super-giver, a super-trainer, a super-missionary, a super-____.  You and God fill in the blank! 

And now, as you get ready to offer the prayer below as a true expression of your heart to God, remember, what the scripture offers is true, “no eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him and are called according to His purposes”.  Suit up today!

 

*Here is a simple prayer to help get you “suited up”:

“God, I have chosen to live in the black suit of sin, meaninglessness, and life apart from your will for me for too long.  Today, right now, I ask that you would make me new, create a new heart in me.  Transform my thinking about life, truth, and you.  Heal me spiritually, and make me what you are calling me to be.  Make me your person, pursuing life your way, and give me a hunger to make you my One Thing in life.  Make me a beautiful example of your love.  And help me to live every day in the new suit you have created for me. Amen”

 

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If you or someone you know read the article above and prayed this prayer, I would love to hear from you about that.  Please, take time to share your story with me at my email address:  soulstormwriter@yahoo.com

 

Grace and Peace,

Bruce Smith

www.soulstormsite.com

www.optimuslife.org

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Radio show, Think Out Loud Podcast is up!

4. August 2008 by BruceSmith.

Check out Bruce’s podcast for his radio show Think Out Loud…it is now up!  This week Bruce interviewed family counselor Melanie Audibert and discussed the nature of happiness, stress, and the search for contentment.  The link is below:

http://wgso.com/content/view/7365/172/

Just cut and past the link into your browser and give it a listen.

Optimuslife.org

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On my way to buy a new pair of shoes…

30. July 2008 by BruceSmith.

On my way to buy a new pair of shoes…for my daughter (an outing which turned into more than a pair of shoes, as it always does) we were struck by a sobering reminder of the fragility of life.

With the summer drawing to an end and the school supply list looming, I set out with my youngest daughter to do a little school prep shopping.  Thinking we would just do shoes on this occasion, and perhaps a new school bag, we headed out on an expedition to her favorite store, some forty-five minutes away.  On the way, as I was deep in thought, thinking about whatever it was I was thinking about, and as my daughter was in the back seat of the gas-guzzling SUV watching a movie, traffic on the Interstate came to an abrupt halt.  We crawled through miles of traffic for some thirty minutes until we finally figured out what the problem was.

Usually, on this stretch of highway, such slowdowns are the result of road construction or some debris on the highway.  On this day, however, the halt in traffic was the result of a more difficult reality.  As we were making our way down the highway, headed west, it became clear that no vehicles were now traveling east.  Sure enough, as we finally got up to the problem area, we saw what had taken place.  A pile-up of several cars had everyone headed east at a complete stop, and it had captured the attention of everyone headed west and just about shut down the flow of traffic on our side.

As we got closer to the accident we noticed just how bad it was.  I have seen a good number of highway pile-ups in my lifetime, but I cannot recall seeing one that told a more sad story.  It was clear, driving next to the wreckage, that in all likelihood, very few, if anyone, actually survived.  Each car that was part of the disaster was totally mangled and charred.  At the back end of several cars was an eighteen-wheeler, with much damage, that had clearly run into everyone ahead.  The cars, trucks, and SUVs were in such a twisted mess that I did not want to imagine how the rescue workers even got people out.

As we continued our drive, my daughter and I prayed aloud for anyone that may have survived and for the families of those who may have been lost.  After we finished praying, I spent the rest of the drive reflecting on just how quickly our lives can be changed.  The scriptures tell us that “life is but a vapor”.  We are here today and then gone in an instant.  I cherished the remainder of the day with my daughter as we shopped till we dropped, and thoroughly enjoyed the day.

I witnessed this incident after having spent several days reading and considering the words of Ecclesiastes.  Essentially, the book is about all that life “offers” us, and the meaninglessness of all that is separated from a God-centered perspective.  All the pleasures, accomplishments, desires, dreams, pains, loss, and the mundane…all of it, is meaningless, ultimately without purpose, if God does not permeate it all.  In the end what do we have if we have not walked with and known our Creator intimately?  As the scriptures say in another passage, “What does it profit a man to gain the world and yet lose his soul?”  Our bodies can be taken in an instant, and our souls remain to give an account to God.

As the impression of that wreckage remains with me, I am more keenly aware of the words which bring the book of Ecclesiastes to a close.  These last two verses, whether we like it or not, whether we acknowledge them or not, sum up this journey we call life.  Here are the words we must all keep central in our lives as we experience all that life brings us,

The end of the matter; all has been heard.  Fear God and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.  For God will bring every deed into judgment, with every secret thing, whether good or evil. (12:13,14)

A knowledge of God, and intimacy with Him–this is the whole of the matter.  This is the purpose of life in a nutshell.  When our lives are drawn to a close, this will be the thing which makes all the difference.  May we live as if it is what makes the difference now.  Aside from a life-giving walk with Him nothing this life brings our way can fulfill us.  Our lives are indeed but a vapor.  Consider the brevity of life, and the nature of your walk with God.  If we are here today let us count it a gift for we are not promised tomorrow.

Grace and Peace,

Bruce Smith

optimuslife.org

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Think Out Loud, Podcast July 26th

29. July 2008 by BruceSmith.

The new Think Out Loud podcast is up at wgso.com.  This week Bruce interviewed singer/songwriter Tammy Trent whose story is one of love and loss.  On Sept. 10, a day before 9/11, she watched in horror as her high school sweetheart and husband of 11 years dove in the waters of Jamaica and never re-surfaced.  A day later, 9/11 heightened the terror in her heart, and she felt as if the entire world were coming apart at the seams.  Hear her inspiring story of faith and hope amidst the pain on the podcast.

Here is the link:

http://wgso.com/content/view/7307/172/Bruce also interviews Mr. Lousiana Politics, Jeff Crouere and looks at Bobby Jindal’s performance so far as well as the Obama hype in light of his recent trip abroad.  Its a fun, insightful talk with one of Louisiana’s most engaging political commentators.

Optimuslife.org

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Dear Bruce …my cheeks are sore!

25. July 2008 by BruceSmith.

Dear Bruce,

What does a person do when despite all efforts to do good, be a friend, sacrifice, and otherwise put someone else first, they are yet perceived incorrectly and mistreated by someone they cared about?

How do we keep “turning the other cheek” when the person we offer our cheek to seems only to enjoy slapping us around?  At what point does a person stand up for what is right, and protect themselves from the abusive words or behavior of others?  Is there a time to say, “Enough is enough!”?

Please, give me some help here.

Brooke

Brooke,

We are, indeed, encouraged in the scriptures to “Turn the other cheek”.  We are also admonished to forgive not just seven times, but “Seventy times seven” which really means…keep doing it.  We are also told to “Live at peace with everyone as much as it depends upon you.”  That means, frankly, sometimes no matter how hard we try, the other guy/gal just does not want to live at peace with us.  So, the trick is to find which situation you are in and act accordingly.

In some situations, after careful thought and consideration the “heaping of burning coals” approach is the way to go.  That is to say, sometimes kindness will finally get that knucklehead’s attention.  At other times, after repeated attempts to demonstrate your care for someone and your desire to live at peace, you just have to say, “I am done with this…you refuse to allow me to make any progress in this situation…we cannot interact like this any more.  I am through until you are willing to help make things better.”

You have to be willing to be sensitive to God’s leading and truly honest with yourself as to what is going on so you can know which way to go.  At times our emotions, fears, urges, and pride can drive our desire to act certain ways.  Those realities can lead us to continue the fight when it should have been ended long ago.

At other times, our fears, insecurities, false humility, and emotional weakness can keep us from being as bold as we ought to be in a given situation.  Sometimes a straightforward telling of the truth is the only way to go.  Often this is what a person needs.  While not easy at first it can help people come to terms with important issues that are affecting their lives.

I have been in both situations and have seen God do really neat things when I took His way through the ordeal.  Not too long ago I stuck with a situation in which I knew I had to keep persevering and keeping taking the blows until something broke…and it finally did.  A relationship was healed and a friendship was maintained.  I was a little sore after the floggings, but I was a better person at the end of it for having endured the situation.

I also recently had to very forthrightly tell someone that they were way off base, totally misinterpreting a situation, and that their behavior was jeopardising our relationship, communication, and fellowship with God.  I have had to do this in the context of relationships, business, ministry, and parenting.  Being a confrontation-averse person by nature, its not always easy, but I always see God’s hand at work when I step up and do it His way.

So, figure out, with God’s leading, which kind of situation you are in.  Be aware of what you are bringing to the situation whether good or bad.  Exercise a little cheek courage where its needed or “man up” on the tough love thing a bit if that’s the play.  Either way, as you step out appropriately, chances are that you and the relationship will be strengthened.  After you have done all you can, and can rest before God knowing you gave it all to Him, then if the other person does not make the same progress…that’s not your responsibility.

Go get em,

Bruce Smith

optimuslife.org

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Learning how to Live …through sickness and death?

24. July 2008 by BruceSmith.

Below, is a testimony on “Learning how to live” from a man most of us know through his radio shows and his work in the White House.  Having had the pleasure of meeting him, I thought he was a unique guy.  I did not realize just how deeply his faith was embedded in his heart.  Sometimes, our toughest moments, our most severe challenges, are the very things which demonstrate who we really are.

Tony Snow, recently deceased, left us this profound writing on the nature of living.  I would encourage you to consider that one can actually embrace these truths without the fear of death right at hand.  Indeed, there have been periods in my own life when I have tasted this kind of quality of life in a very tangible sense.  All of us, powered by the grace of God, can tune our hearts, minds and spirits to this kind of living.  We can live appreciating every breath, each smile, the flight of each bird we see, the beauty of each pedal of every flower, the artistry in the world around us, each note in every song, and the many and varied hints of God’s majesty which surround us moment by moment.

Savor the read below.

 

Bruce Smith (optimuslife.org)

 

MY TESTIMONY (Tony Snow)

 

‘Blessings arrive in unexpected packages, - in my case, cancer. Those of us with potentially fatal diseases - and there are millions in America today - find ourselves in the odd position of coping with our mortality while trying to fathom God’s will. Although it would be the height of presumption to declare with confidence ‘What It All Means,’ Scripture provides powerful hints and consolations. 

The first is that we shouldn’t spend too much time trying to answer the ‘why’ questions: Why me? Why must people suffer? Why can’t someone else get sick? We can’t answer such things. And the questions themselves often are designed more to express our anguish than to solicit an answer. 

I don’t know why I have cancer, and I don’t much care. It is what it is, a plain and indisputable fact. Yet even while staring into a mirror darkly, great and stunning truths began to take shape. Our maladies define a central feature of our existence: We are fallen. We are imperfect. Our bodies give out. 

But, despite this, - or because of it, - God offers the possibility of salvation and grace. We don’t know how the narrative of our lives will end, but we get to choose how to use the interval between now and the moment we meet our Creator face-to-face. 

Second, we need to get past the anxiety. The mere thought of dying can send adrenaline flooding through your system. A dizzy, unfocused panic seizes you. Your heart thumps; your head swims. You think of nothingness and swoon. You fear partings; you worry about the impact on family and friends. You fidget and get nowhere. 

To regain footing, remember that we were born not into death, but into life - and that the journey continues after we have finished our days on this earth. We accept this on faith, but that faith is nourished by a conviction that stirs even within many non-believing hearts - an institution that the gift of life, once given, cannot be taken away. Those who have been stricken enjoy the special privilege of being able to fight with their might, main, and faith to live fully, richly, exuberantly - no matter how their days may be numbered. 

Third, we can open our eyes and hearts. God relishes surprise. We want lives of simple, predictable ease, - smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see, - but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance and comprehension - and yet don’t. By His love and grace, we persevere. The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise. 

‘You Have Been Called’. Picture yourself in a hospital bed. The fog of anesthesia has begun to wear away. A doctor stands at your feet, a loved one holds your hand at the side. ‘It’s cancer,’ the healer announces. 

The natural reaction is to turn to God and ask him to serve as a cosmic Santa. ‘Dear God, make it all go away. Make everything simpler.’ But another voice whispers: ‘You have been called.’ Your quandary has drawn you closer to God, closer to those you love, closer to the issues that matter, - and has dragged into insignificance the banal concerns that occupy our ‘normal time.’ 

There’s another kind of response, although usually short-lived, an inexplicable shudder of excitement as if a clarifying moment of calamity has swept away everything trivial and tiny, and placed before us the challenge of important questions. 

The moment you enter the Valley of the Shadow of Death, things change. You discover that Christianity is not something doughy, passive, pious, and soft. Faith may be the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. But it also draws you into a world shorn of fearful caution. The life of belief teems with thrills, boldness, danger, shocks, reversals, triumphs, and epiphanies. Think of Paul, traipsing through the known world and contemplating trips to what must have seemed the antipodes (Spain), shaking the dust from his sandals, worrying not about the morrow, but only about the moment. 

There’s nothing wilder than a life of humble virtue, - for it is through selflessness and service that God wrings from our bodies and spirits the most we ever could give, the most we ever could offer, and the most we ever could do. 

Finally, we can let love change everything. When Jesus was faced with the prospect of crucifixion, he grieved not for himself, but for us. He cried for Jerusalem before entering the Holy City. From the Cross, he took on the cumulative burden of human sin and weakness, and begged for forgiveness on our behalf. 

We get repeated chances to learn that life is not about us, that we acquired purpose and satisfaction by sharing in God’s love for others. Sickness gets us part way there. It reminds us of our limitations and dependence. But it also gives us a chance to serve the healthy. A minister friend of mine observes that people suffering grave afflictions often acquire the faith of two people, while loved ones accept the burden of two peoples’ worries and fears. 

‘Learning How to Live’. Most of us have watched friends as they drifted toward God’s arms, not with resignation, but with peace and hope. In so doing, they have taught us not how to die, but how to live. They have emulated Christ by transmitting the power and authority of live. 

I sat by my best friend’s bedside a few years ago as a wasting cancer took him away. He kept at his table a worn Bible and a 1928 edition of the Book of Common Prayer. A shattering grief disabled his family, many of his old friends, and at least one priest. Here was an humble and very good guy, someone who apologized when he winced with pain because he thought it made his guest uncomfortable. He restrained his equanimity and good humor literally until his last conscious moment. ‘I’m going to try to beat [this cancer],’ he told me several months before he died. ‘But if I don’t, I’ll see you on the other side.’

His gift was to remind everyone around him that even though God doesn’t promise us tomorrow, he does promise us eternity - filled with life and love we cannot comprehend, - and that one can, in the throes of sickness, point the rest of us toward timeless truths that will help us weather future storms. 

Through such trials, God bids us to choose: Do we believe, or do we not? Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit, and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations? Can we surrender our concern in things that don’t matter so that we might devote our remaining days to things that do? 

When our faith flags, He throws reminders in our way. Think of the prayer warriors in our midst. They change things, and those of us who have been on the receiving end of their petitions and intercessions know it. It is hard to describe, but there are times when suddenly the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you feel a surge of the Spirit. Somehow you just know: Others have chosen, when talking to the Author of all creation, to lift us up, - to speak of us! 

This is love of a very special order. But so is the ability to sit back and appreciate the wonder of every created thing. The mere thought of death somehow makes every blessing vivid, every happiness more luminous and intense. We may not know how our contest with sickness will end, but we have felt the ineluctable touch of God. 

What is man that Thou are mindful of him? We don’t know much, but we know this: No matter where we are, no matter what we do, no matter how bleak or frightening our prospects, each and every one of us who believe each and every day, lies in the same safe and impregnable place, in the hollow of God’s hand.’

T. Snow

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Architects of what?

22. July 2008 by BruceSmith.

As a human people, we tend to crave the role of the architect, …of our lives that is.   Architects are builders, engineers, and designers.  Architects manage projects, which when done well, bring them acclaim, attention, notoriety, and wealth.  As a man who once lived in a city renowned for its architecture (Chicago), I really appreciate great design in the field.  I appreciate the aesthetics, the design principles,  and the artistry involved.

I have recently been inspired to consider this theme for various reasons.  For starters, I just read a story on the re-design of the city of Beijing leading up to the Olympic Games.  Some truly amazing marvels of design have been crafted in the last few years, one of the most truly fantastic being the soon to be completed, gravity defying, megalith, known as the CCTV building (yes, that’s the state run media company).   The building, which jolts the mind, appears to be one which should not “work”.  In fact, it has been suggested that this could not have been pulled off even a few years ago.  It took some pretty astounding computer power to even be able to design this building.  As you look at the marvel it appears that an entire section of it is suspended in mid-air.  Designers used some 10,000 tons of steel to pull off this feat which includes a cantilevered cross-section floored with glass which allows visitors to feel as though they are “walking on air” as they make it across.  The building, at a cost of some $800 million is now the second largest office building in the world, second only to the Pentagon.

What is so striking to me about this story is the nature of what will go on “inside” this amazing facade.  The state, of China that is, will work its media “magic” (manipulation, distortion) from inside this fascinating shell.  What many people are talking about is the disconnect between the architecture and the nature of the political reality playing out on the inside.  For me, this serves as a great metaphor for the way we are inclined to pursue life.  In the case of China, the building serves, in reality, to heighten the contrasting realities at play within that nation.  What appears creative, inspiring, challenging, and forward-looking on the outside is actually quite controlled, restrictive, oppressive, and inhumane.

Allow me, now, to turn from the political/cultural realities in China to our own culture where we also are prone to build a shell which captures the attention of others even as we are dying on the inside.  Hollywood and its products, which are in reality a personification of our deep desires as individuals, provides a direct connection to this truth.  As you know, assuming you have read much of my writing in the past, I appreciate the best that Hollywood has to offer and I love the arts.  So, this is not one of those “ban, boycott, and blast” kind of messages.

I point to Hollywood only because we seem as a people to be clearly enamored with the lifestyles and success of those who are most known in the industry, and recent celebrity news has highlighted this reality.  Additionally, billions of dollars, our dollars, flow into Hollywood each year as we entertain ourselves.  Some of us, the social research suggests, make an attempt to escape our realities through our engagement with Hollywood, and find that the entertainment becomes something more.  This is true not only for those who watch the movies, but also for those who make them.

So here is the truth hidden beneath the architecture of our external lives.  Like those in Hollywood who seem to have all that life could offer, we tend to delude ourselves into thinking that we can design our own lives around the pleasure principle and see nothing but good come from it.  Give me enough food, fun, fantasy, and fame…and I will be fulfilled.  In a culture intoxicated with visual stimulation and acquisition, we are too easily confused about what is real and what is delusion.  Is this not the overarching storyline in the new Batman movie, The Dark Knight?  Is not the Joker’s delusion that he assumed a “no rules” approach would grant him immunity from his fears, quests, desires?  What he comes to find, in fact, is a much darker reality.  Alone, pursuing the survival of the fittest ethic, the Joker, and perhaps Heath Ledger in real life, came to find out that such a distorted approach leads to emotional imprisonment, bitterness, violence, depression, and the death of a soul.  This is the story for many a Hollywood storyline, and sadly, many a Hollywood actor.  Amy Whinehouse, Paris, Lindsey, and so many more point to this dark reality.  Today’s news, revealing the arrest of Christian Bale for alleged assault on members of his own family (mother and sister), just a day before the release of Batman in London, points to this truth as well.  Fame, success, access to all we desire, it would appear, does not fix us internally.

I would suggest that the same is true of us.  If we desire to find the meaning of life we cannot hope to find it in creating an external shell which impresses others with sight, sound, and special effects.  Pleasure, possessions, and even power can never defy the laws of reality as they exist in the spiritual world.  Your title, position, and privilege may impress those who are unwilling or unable to look deeper, but you will never fool yourself.  Sadly, like Heath Ledger and so many others, all of us who lust for a lifestyle disconnected from God’s truths, and who build a life in defiance of the principles of the Builder, eventually see our edifice falling in a spectacular crash.  Our spirits, our souls cannot endure the stress which weighs upon a life lived for false hopes.

Eventually, we are all forced to ask the ultimate questions.  Eventually, we all  must look into our souls, looking past the mirror, and come to terms with who we are on the inside.  Things, and even pleasures, may come an go, but our souls remain.  If you live long enough you will eventually find out that no  amount of pleasure is ever enough.  For all, actually, who live for pleasure, the craving only increases.  Those that seek peace from the storms of life upon the false hopes of drugs, alcohol, or sex, find an ever increasing despair awaiting them.  Those things cannot, will not, and never have satisfied the soul.  They may stimulate the body for a short while, but even amidst that stimulation the infrastructure is stressing.

I would ask you today, “Who is the architect of your life?”  What are the principles which define your lifestyle?”  Has survival of the fittest lead you into ever increasing places of relational bliss and contentment?  Has the quest for unending pleasure granted you more meaning?  If not, consider turning the design plans for your life over to the only one who can construct a life worth living.  As Solomon found, everything else is a chasing after the wind, a false hope, a no-win proposition.  Solomon, the wisest who ever lived, a man of staggering wealth, accomplishment, power, and pleasure, came to find that nothing outside of God satisfied him.  This man, who had all the tangible tools needed to try everything on the planet to get soul satisfaction, could not find it apart from a relationship with God.  He was even intentional about his quest.  He said to himself, “Let’s see which of these things will fulfill me.”  He found no “thing” would.

How is your life holding up?  Are there design flaws?  Does your life need shoring up?  Turn to the only one who can match your hungers to the right source of fulfillment.  Yes, that is the God of the scriptures, as revealed in the person of Jesus.  If you have tried everything else, or if you have turned away from Him, consider making your way back to Him today.  There is safety in the arms of and in the care of this Architect.  His blueprint is sure.

Bruce Smith

optimuslife.org

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Bruce’s “Think Out Loud” Podcast

21. July 2008 by BruceSmith.

The podcast for Saturday’s show, featuring Fred Luter, is now up at WGSO.com  Just go to the site, click on the podcast section and hit the “Think Out Loud” podcast for the proper date!  Here is the direct link:

http://wgso.com/content/view/7262/172/

Tomorrow on Bruce’s blog:  Pleasure Quest, and the pursuit of life without boundaries

optimuslife.org

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Wonder, Truth, Love, Meaning

16. July 2008 by BruceSmith.

Wonder, Truth, Love, Meaning…without these our lives are empty and without hope.  Today, rather than hear from me, I am encouraging you to listen to the following audio link from Ravi Zacharias (rzim.org).  He addresses this reality in just 15 minutes, and his words are profound. Ravi is an apologist who primarily spends his time lecturing in IvyLeague settings and before world leaders.  His cultural insights are staggeringly insightful.  The link below is one part of a series on Meaning.

Here is the link:

http://www.rzim.org/USA/Resources/Listen/JustThinking.aspx?archive=1&pid=1265

Simply cut and paste it into your browser, and give it a listen.  As you know, I treasure the time I spend writing, and I value my interaction with you.  I point you to this link today because I believe Ravi’s words are potent, relevant, and crucial for our culture.

Is there any wonder, truth, love, or meaning in your life?

Bruce Smith

optimuslife.org

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